After my hubby proposed to me a couple of years back, I had a burning desire to return the favor with something that matched his taste and preferences that he would cherish. I planned out a whole thing with a dance and a song, and I proposed to him a few weeks after he proposed to me.
But as I was doing my research to find the perfect ring for him, I realized there aren't really that many options out there when it comes to engagement rings for men. Wedding bands and engagements kind of blend into one product when it comes to shopping for guys, and the market seems to be very small.
As I was planning to propose to my boo, people were making faces when I told them my plans and saying things like, "Oh, aren't you modern." I really didn't think about how engagement rings were seemingly only for women until I got proposed to.
What's so bad about getting a guy a ring, and why aren't jewelers capitalizing on the prospect of selling more with two rings instead of one when it comes to this very special moment in a couple's lives?
I almost took offense to the whole idea that I would be the only one getting a ring for the engagement because I felt like I wasn't the only one entering the agreement, so it didn't make a lick of sense to me. Just as much as Julian saw me as the prize, I wanted to see him as the prize as well.
One of the known reasons behind this lacking of male bling is because of the history of how engagement rings work. Before 1945, this ring was tied to a woman's virginity and used as a type of collateral. Very old-timey and a hot mess, I know.
Back in the day, giving a girl an engagement ring allowed a man to give her a test drive, so to speak. But if he backed out of the engagement, she would be able to keep the ring that was given as a sort of insurance. And this was needed because in the olden days if you were deflowered and not wed, you would be damaged goods.
If you were damaged goods, then you would not be able to find a husband, which would put your financial situation in grave danger as a woman in those times. But for a man, purity or virginity didn't have the same weight, so it wasn't necessary for them to get these rings.
In more modern times, where women are more sexually liberated and able to provide for themselves financially, the rules don't really need to apply the same way that they did back in the day, but old habits stick.
This is not to say that I am a super unique case when it comes to getting an engagement ring for my man. Many other ladies have chosen to do the same shortly after being proposed to, and more modern ladies out there have decided to be the first ones to get down on one knee and propose to their man!
Giving your man an engagement ring would rarely be a bad idea. It's a great way to show your man that you appreciate and cherish him as much as he does you and a good way to signify that you are entering into a partnership where both of you can shine.
If your guy is one that already into wearing jewelry and likes to be a bit flashy, getting a ring for him is a definite yes. If one of his top love languages is receiving gifts, he will absolutely cherish the ring you give him.
If you have a guy that really doesn't like to wear jewelry or a ring, in particular, you may want to try showing your appreciation for him in the form of a different gift that fits his preferences better.
Should you feel compelled like you absolutely have to get your man a ring just because he gave one to you? Absolutely not! If that's not your style, then don't try to force something that isn't natural for you. You can have a perfectly healthy engagement and marriage without giving him an engagement ring.
It's a myth that wearing an engagement ring will make your guy less of a man, so don't subscribe to that nonsense if you hear someone spouting it around you or him. There also won't be any bad luck of you put a ring on him before the wedding.
Now here's the tricky part: where to find a good ring to buy! As I previously stated, when you're shopping for an engagement ring for men, you'll likely just run across a bunch of wedding bands since the market isn't really large enough.
You'll also run into a ton of cheap rings. The price for a guy's ring will be around 1/10th of the rings you'll see for women. While it may seem like a bad idea, a cheap ring can really come in handy for a guy that enjoys simple things and doesn't need anything that will break the bank.
For rings on the cheaper side that are more of a token of love and great for young couples, you can find some pretty nice choices on a site like Amazon that will give you a bit of variety when it comes to sellers and designs.
If you're looking for more premium products with rings that are designed to last for a long time, try a brand like Manly Bands, which has tons of lovely-looking rings that men are very proud to rock wherever they go.
To avoid getting your fiance basically two bands, consider getting him a less expensive ring for the engagement and replacing that with a fancier band for the wedding. The wedding bands look just like engagement rings for men, and it's not likely that you'll find a man who will want to wear two bands.